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31 January 2014

27 January 2014

Rangers parade is tomorrow, will make its way to NJ this time

SATIRE
By Kevin Canessa Jr.

Just days before the Super Bowl, the New York Rangers will march along in a big parade in Manhattan to mark their One Game in January Championship, after they slaughtered the New Jersey Devils, 7-3, at Yankee Stadium, before more than 50,000 adoring Rangers fans and annoying Devils fans, Madison Square Garden Chairman James Dolan said this morning -- as did this morning's New York Daily News.

"With this victory, the New York Rangers put themselves solidly in second-place in the Metropolitan Division -- and we couldn't be more delighted," Dolan said. "We were thrilled to keep that son-of-a-bitch Adam Henrique off the scoreboard, and we were even more thrilled to have knocked that donut-eating, fat-pig, sister-in-law screwing (Martin Pierre) Brodeur out of the game after the second period."

Dolan says the parade won't be like a typical parade. Instead, it will commence at the Garden, make its way to and through the Lincoln Tunnel, up Route 495 to Route 3, to the parking lot of the Izod Center, so as to rub it in the faces of Devils fans that the Rangers will be able to draw more people to a regular-season championship rally than the Devils were able to do three times in winning Cups.

"And the NJSEA were more than willing to allow us to do this, even with the Super Bowl preparations," Dolan said. "They haven't quite forgotten the Devs leaving East Rutherford for Newark -- and nor have we."

To make matters more intriguing, Dolan says he's been able to secure Doc Emrick to be the emcee, with sidekick, Stephane Matteau, the father.

"Matteau, Matteau, Matteau!" Dolan said. "Can't wait to see Mount Vancouver."

Among the special guests to speak at the parade: Jim Schmiedeberg, Edward Geick, James Graham, Michael Slane Sr., David Weir, Gregory Peldunas, Steven Schaffer, the Oofman, Justin Fried, Eric Rodaman, Bradley Rodaman, John Tortorella, Matthew Morello and a host of others from Blueshirt Underground.

"I want to thank Mr. Dolan for paying for my ticket from Arizona to Newark," an elated Schmiedeberg said. "And I'd also like to thank him for partnering me up with Brian Boyle on the day of the parade. He must know how much I love Brian Boyle."

Among the singers at the Izod Center will be New York favourites who trump silly Jersey singers like Southside Johnny, Bruce and Bon Jovi, including Jay-Z, Neil Sedaka and Long Island's own Billy Joel.

"We threw Billy in there to say 'suck it' to Islanders fans, too, before we beat them in the Second Game in January Championship," goaltender Henrik 'The King' Lundqvist said. "If we could get Frank Sinatra, we would have done that, too. Oh, and by the way, now that the world saw it on national TV, what did you think of my tattoo? Was sexy yes?"

Festivities kick off tomorrow at 9 a.m. at the Garden. The rally at the Izod Center should begin around 11 a.m., or whenever the lads get there.

02 January 2014

Tomorrow’s game v. Chicago is close to a sellout, but could weather keep people away?

There are only a handful of seats left for tomorrow’s home game against the Stanley Cup Champion Chicago Blackhawks, but could the weather keep people away?

In the past, inclement weather has always negatively affected Devils’ attendance.

It’ll be interesting to see what happens tomorrow.

When tickets to a sold-out game are being sold still, the game is clearly not sold out

Clever use of words by the Devils. If you're offering a raffle for a chance to BUY tickets for a sold-out game, the game really isn't sold out. Nice try, though.


01 January 2014

Winter Classic crowd of 105,491 is largest in NHL history

The 2014 Winter Classic saw the largest crowd ever for an NHL game -- 105,491. The Maple Leafs beat the Red Wings, 3-2, in a shootout. The game was hardly a so-called classic though, as snow made it very difficult for players to move and see the puck. Hoping the conditions are better at Yankee Stadium for Devils-Rangers.

Where did 1,033 seats go?

Until this year, when the Devils had a sellout, the attendance was 17,625. Now, this year, when it’s a sellout, the attendance is 16,592.

I asked Rich Chere, of the Star-Ledger, if he had any idea what’s going on -- or why the capacity is suddenly more than 1,000 seats fewer than before.

He says no one in the Devils organization is willing to say what happened or why there’s been a change.

I also sent emails to the organization, as well as direct Tweets, and nothing has been answered.

The mystery continues ...

31 December 2013

Here's a look at Marty’s Stadium-Series mask

Loving that classic green!

It’s a 1 p.m. matchup for the Devils on a Tuesday at the Rock

Don’t forget -- the Devils play this afternoon at 1 p.m. at home v. the Penguins (MSG+, WFAN). Not too often there’s a 1 p.m. game in the middle of the week. But hell, it’s New Year’s Eve. If you go, stay safe, and don’t drink and drive. But have a good time, nonetheless. A win puts the Devils over .500 going into 2014 -- and who would have ever thought that possible the way this team started off?